Those nice and clean Olsen Twins starring in "So Little Time" are monsters in reality, folks!

"A ragged and misshapen girl officials are calling a "third Olsen twin" was rescued from the basement of the residence of teen superstars Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen Tuesday, Los Angeles police said.

'The girl has been positively identified as a sister of Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, born on the same day in June 1986,' said LAPD Capt. Ellen Yanez, relating information provided in a confession by parents David and Janette Olsen, now divorced. 'The monstrously contorted child was discovered living in conditions that could charitably be described as squalid.' Currently in custody at LAPD headquarters, the twisted, hunched, foul-smelling figure of Ethel Olsen, 17, is drawing both pity and horror from investigators. (...) The Olsen parents face multiple charges of child abuse and reckless endangerment of a minor, but they are also reportedly in negotiations with television executives to develop a sitcom starring Ethel."

Some stories just make me puke. This is the one of them. Ugly Picture ahead! Read the whole thing in The Onion