"That was the mission for all of us... 'How do we get younger kids?'" -Rodney Jerkins on making the last Michael Jackson album

Reasons why you should feel sorry... << ... for Michael Jackson

* His name is an anagram of "He's jail cock man". 
So he never had a chance, really. 

* He once asked Elizabeth Taylor to marry
him and "be his queen". Despite his offer of 
a diamond necklace of twin monkeys with matching 
monkey earrings, the heartless bitch refused. 

* Instead of hair, he has a wig based on a 
plastic membrane which exactly fits his skull.

* Bubbles is dead, not "living in an animal 
sanctuary". To add insult to injury, Michael's 
sister LaToya has been making porn, using the 
stage name of... Bubbles. 

* He used to keep his weight down with loads of
self-administered enemas... which led to him
having to wear a tampon up his bum to control 
embarassing leakage. 

* When he was young his brothers called him 
"Big Nose". And now he has no nose at all. 

More fun facts about whacko Jacko:

-A 17-year-old boy in France committed suicide because his mother wouldn't let him have plastic surgery to look like Michael Jackson.

-Eminem and friends refer to Justin Timberlake as "Baby Michael" - (as in Jackson).

-Cutlery and crockery used by Michael Jackson's children is sterilised and thrown away immediately after use.

-Michael Jackson and Adam Ant were extremely close "phone friends" in the 80s - they used to ring each other regularly to talk about costumes and dancing.

-During the 90s it was alleged that the monkeys at the Neverland ranch were trained to masturbate when Jacko gave them a special signal.

-Michael's brother Jermaine named his son Jermajesty. Let's hope he doesn't grow up gay, otherwise people might call him "Jermajesty the Queen".

-In the 80s, Michael Jackson and Freddie Mercury did three songs together. However Freddie was "fired" when Jacko caught him snorting gak in his bathroom.

• Michael Jackson's faceless performance

  When Michael Jackson performed at the 1996 Brit awards, the strong white TV lights went right through his silicone face. As a result, TV images only showed a skull, with no visible skin at all.

  So before the show was broadcast the following night, a technician had to sit and painstakingly draw over the skull to create the illusion of skin and face....in every single frame of his performance.

Buy a scary painting of Jacko

taken from popbitch.com